Friday, April 15, 2011

His name is Meaty

It was my third day in the hospital and my fiance came to visit. Except it was not only me he came to visit.

"I wanted to introduce you to someone," I said. I was standing with my IV in my left hand as to solution bags dripped through long tubes. I wore powder fleece blue pyjamas with snowmen all over them and purple slippers. My dredlocks were in short plaits a la Celie from the Color Purple. I stood with my neck slightly extended in front of me and a little hunched. I shuffled my feet from side to side in a sort of penguin walk. "His name is Meaty."

My fiance probably thought I flew over the cuckoo's nest. Going delusional. Too many painkillers? Sorry. I didn't use any painkillers after surgery. Maybe it was the cabin fever but I decided to name my surgical incision. Meaty. Why? Well, that's self-explanatory.

During my healing, Meaty has been going through his own transition.

From this

To this

To this

And now this

Thank God for Vitamin E and Scar Gel (and naturopathic creams like Calendula) and most importantly time.

"Why do you take pictures of your neck?" asked Camille, my friend Amy's five-year old daughter.

"Because I like to," I told her. That was part of the reason.

I like to measure and observe the transition my body is going through. By photographing Meaty's healing, I am reminded of the healing taking place inside. Meaty will take a full two years to heal. During this time, a lot of changes will take place both inside and out.


PrincessShawna said...

So far in reading your blog I can relate to the thyroid cancer. I haven't made it very far, yet, but looking forward to reading more. I am having a struggle right now. Just a short snippet of mine...I found a lump, all the tests were inconclusive I went to an otolaryngologist, went through more inconclusive testing went back on a tuesday to find out I would have surgery that friday & THAT was the day I found out I had cancer (almost a month & 1/2 after finding the lump). Now I am in an in between stage & waiting, waiting, waiting for thyroid regulation meds & really hating life at the moment. Although I never said anything much to my boyfriend, family or friends I privately named mine "Slash" (like the lead guitarist from Guns N Roses). Seems like a lot of your blog, just skimming through, is going to resonate a lot with me.

Blue Butterfly said...

I love receiving comments like this. Princess Shawna this is the reason why I do this blog. I'm glad you could relate and that I'm not the only one who named my scar. The fine needle aspiration (FNA) is not always accurate. In fact, some folks have to get it repeated (imagine that!) and/or have the thyroidectomy before finding out if they have cancer. I feel lucky that I knew what I had 1 week after the FNA. Stay strong my friend and I love the name of your scar. Slash! He was always my favourite GNR member anyway.

PrincessShawna said...

Thank you so much. I also sent you a very lengthy email to your blue butterfly email. It comes from . Luckily enough I only had one FNA & he decided not to repeat it. I just posted a reply & decided to add to it so I deleted the other. When I sent the email, I forgot I had posted my comment here earlier in the evening.